Posted by
This Guy on Monday, September 18, 2006 9:24:23 AM
I am infuriated by the lack of respect that my co-workers have for me. I recently overheard someone in the break room quoting my manager as having said that I "tend to leave garbage all over the counters, and explode burritos in the microwave", and let me tell you, I nearly smashed that guy in the face with my coffee mug.
It's not that what he said was false ... I often microwave burritos for a good five or six minutes, because I love that dull, meaty popping sound they make when they blow their beef-and-beany goodness all over the place, and I usually don't feel like throwing my own trash in the garbage cans because I know there are other people who will take care of that for me. But for other people to talk about my actions as if there is something wrong with me, that's just completely unacceptable. It's intolerant, and I won't stand by while that sort of behavior is allowed to go on in my work place.
To protest management's tacit approval of such unenlightened commentary, I have ripped the coffee maker out of the break room (it's under my desk), smashed the glass out of the vending machines and scattered their contents all over the office, and crammed the microwave in the toilet. Also, I have made several effigies of the offending co-worker which I plan to burn every hour, on the hour, until these barbarians I work with finally give me the proper respect that I deserve.