Posted by
This Guy on Wednesday, August 09, 2006 11:51:37 AM
I'm preparing to wage a legal war on the National Football League for their discriminatory practices. I decided earlier this year that I'd like to play pro football this season, and thought I'd make a pretty good QB, because I played
Madden once, and even though I didn't win, I did pull off some pretty good plays.
Well, imagine my surprise when I was told I had neither the experience nor the athleticism "required" to play professional football. The only other time I've been met with such blatant discrimination was back when I tried to join a wolf sanctuary.
First off, who made the NFL the Ultimate Judge of athleticism? And what is "athleticism" anyway, except a socially-constructed illusion, designed solely to create a permanent underclass of sports consumers, upon whom Big Business organizations (such as the NFL) prey? It isn't my fault that I weigh 140 pounds. It's simply the result of my genetics. I can't believe that the NFL would have the gall in this day and age to dare suggest that my biological composition would have any bearing on my ability and my right to play football at the highest level.
And citing my lack of experience? Well, excuse me Mr. NFL, I'm
so sorry I wasn't raised by parents actively engaged in encouraging me to play football. Not all of us are born into environments where we have rich Corinthian leather footballs handed to us in sliver super bowls. Some of us were busy doing things like working on homework, watching TV, and playing video games, while others had the opportunity to enjoy two-a-days in August.
And I hate to play the race card, but should I be surprised that I'm being rejected on the basis of ethereal things like "athleticism" and "experience", when I happen to be white? I mean, if you look at the
NFL's player roster, it's pretty clear that whites are massively underrepresented, as compared to the
US's general population. I'm not saying the NFL is racist, necessarily, but I do think a review of their selection process is in order. Surely there are some metrics that can be introduced to ensure a more balanced representation of our nation.
I don't expect my suit against the NFL to gain much traction ... they have far too much money to spend defending their entrenched methods of selection, which I like to call "Team Building Processes of Hate". But I do hope that every Monday night, football fans everywhere will remember my maltreatment and consider watching a movie instead of supporting the oppressive machinations of the NFL.